I would have had this post published 'on time' but Monday night our indoor cat got out. After nearly two hours of calling to him, and a 30 minute thunderstorm, he did not return. We still haven't seen any sign of him despite literally doing everything feasible in the last 48 hours to find him. All we can do now is wait and try to remain optimistic. It really is a terrible feeling not knowing what on earth could have happened to him.
Tuesday night (last night) my mom was here, spending the night so that I could take her to the airport at 5am today. I was all set to sit down and finish this post when my dad called to say that my mom's flight had been canceled. My parents literally have the worst travel karma of any people I know. Long story short she ended up canceling her trip but still spent the night because I was too lazy to drive her home after 8:30pm.
So here we are Wednesday, again. In less than two weeks baby boy will be here!
Baby stats: The baby center email that arrived in my inbox this week was downright cruel....unintentionally I suppose. All I could read of the body on my phone said, "Your Pregnancy 37 Weeks! - Has baby arrived?" No, no the baby has most definitely NOT arrived, but thanks for asking! At this point he is fully developed but will continue to put on weight while he hangs out and waits for his eviction date. I started having babies way back when 37 weeks was considered "full term", apparently that has changed with some practitioners. I really couldn't care less what anyone calls it...this baby is fully cooked!
Yes I have a few things going on right now that I do not love; nightly heartburn, leg cramps, cankles, and an early afternoon crash that hits like clockwork at 1:30pm. I know I was still working at this point with Lily but all of that is such a blur. I imagine by the end of the day I was pretty freaking tired. I have one very vivid memory of being brought nearly to tears because I had to cover a study hall on the opposite side of the building and up two flights of stairs and I only had four minutes to get there...and at 39 weeks pregnant it might as well have been on the moon! With Ben I was just starting to get hit with allergy season so I was miserable but not because I was pregnant. This time around, what can I say, with all of the sickness behind me I am really content to just ride out these next 12 days.
I am nesting like a crazy person. I will never understand the evolution of such a desperate urge to clean underneath the refrigerator (seriously I will kill someone if this task does not get done) while simultaneously being unable to see my own feet. I am trying to go room by room and one day at a time so that I don't end up getting in over my head (i.e. throwing every article of clothing my family owns into the middle of the living room so that I can refold and put it all away 'neatly'. This action will without a doubt cause me to go into immediate and urgent labor resulting in a total loss of sanity at the thought that my mother and father in law, upon seeing laundry mountain, would have an unfiltered view directly into my crazy). :::waves hi to Mimi::::
ANYWAY, today I folded and put away the kids clothes and meticulously vacuumed every square centimeter of their bedrooms. Tomorrow I move on to the bathrooms.
Contractions, contractions, SO many contractions. I get tired of timing them to be honest. I am pretty confident that they are doing absolutely nothing. Last night they were about 5 minutes apart for the better part of The Late Show...and then I fall asleep. I will say that I am legitimately in awe of a bodily mechanism that can be timed to the second. I may not be great a birthing babies the old fashioned way but man does my body keep good time!
Aversions/Cravings: Meh, sad to report that food is just food again. I eat to avoid feeling unwell. I have absolutely zero desire to cook. I would still trade you my left arm for an ice cold summer ale in a tall frosty glass.
Sleeping: Ok. My mind is very busy with nesting all night long so I have been having a harder than usual time falling asleep. Staying asleep these days isn't happening either but so long as I don't feel dead tired when I wake up I can usually keep my spirits up.
Movement: Still moving A LOT, especially when I am having contractions. I actually googled it to see if it was 'normal' (it is) for a baby to become more active during contractions. Like I said I will miss it when it is not part of my day.
Milestones: I have officially gained 30 lbs. After tomorrow I will have just one OB appointment scheduled before my c-section.
I supposed this next one is a milestone...some might say right of passage ?? ... I have my first ever stretch mark. SO SAD. It is on the underside of my enormo-belly and has probably been there for a awhile but I will fully admit I was super bummed when I first saw it.
I am looking forward to: The final days as a family of four. We are heading to the beach on Friday to spend the morning together. There are a few other little things I would like to do, but for the most part just soaking in these precious days.
Worries: There are a few things that I have started to worry about but more than anything I was struck by something Dingle asked me the other night. He is a little worried that I will have postpartum depression this time, thinking that this is 'it' for us. He isn't wrong, if I allow myself to think "this is the last time that..." thoughts I do think I will be overcome by sadness. I am not going to go there. The fact is, unless something happens during this baby's birth that would prevent me from carrying another baby, nothing is ever really off the table.
I am a little worried about my hormones in general. I am already feeling very torn about being away from my kids while I am recovering in the hospital. I suspect that will be very hard on me. I am also worried about the 'mama bear' feelings I am already having in regard to the new baby. In the past Matt and I have had a few days at home alone with the new baby before the cavalry arrived. This time with so much family around, which we are blessed to have obviously, I am already not wanting to 'share'. All I can do is cross that bridge when we get there.
Coasting through the final weeks in relative comfort...for the third time!
Hormones in general have been kicked in to high gear, a little early this time around.
I've officially gained the most weight with this baby.
Best moment of the week: Impossible to pick just one from my sister's visit. The beach was a highlight for sure. Summer in general is just so awesome.